I am not a doctor, just a mom with 10+ years of experience with stimming.
So, What is Stimming?
Does your child ever rock back and forth, make repeated noises or humming, or flap their hands, and you are not sure what it means? We call it stimming, and it’s more common than you might think.
People stim for a variety of reasons. The child may be trying to regulate emotion or express themselves. People often think only children with autism stim, but guess what- EVERYONE does it to some extent. Think of a time you got some exciting news and you jumped up and down or clapped, or you were anxious and you were shaking your leg up and down or twirling your hair- that was stimming. Neurodivergent kids just do it more. People don’t just see this in kids with autism- anyone can do it- it’s common in ADD/ADHD as well. A stim can be:
-Something that provides sensory reinforcement
-Helps the child by providing sensory input
-Helps the child by regulating their sensory input
They can sometimes be self-harming- skin picking or head banging are some types of harmful stims.
What Are Some Common Ways?
My daughter Hannah has many different stims. She flaps her hands when she is overwhelmed or excited. She rocks back and forth a lot. Hannah will either rock while standing, usually if watching TV, and she also rocks when sitting in a chair or on the bed. She said this helps calm her down. Hannah has a stim with her fingers- she will wiggle her fingers on both hands together, sometimes right in front of her face. She also will hum or make repeated sounds, usually an animal (cats and monkeys are her favorite). She would twirl her hair into knots that I had to cut out when she was younger.
Some common stims:
-Rocking
-Hand flapping
-Rubbing or stroking something
-Repeating sounds or humming
-Spinning in circles
Does Stimming Mean My Child is Autistic?
No, not necessarily. It is common in Autistic children, but people often see it in neurodivergent children, such as those with ADHD. Neurodivergent just means that a person’s brain functions differently from a “typical” brain. It doesn’t mean they are wrong- they just do things a little differently. As I said earlier, everyone stims sometimes. Hand flapping is an almost stereotypical behavior associated with Autism. While it is commonly seen, it does not mean that your child is Autistic.
Should I Stop My Child From Stimming?
Sometimes, your child’s way of processing their senses is stimming. As long as it isn’t disruptive or will hurt Hannah in any way, I allow her to stim. I feel that this is her way of coping with something that may be bigger than she can handle. Therefore, I don’t want to take away an essential coping mechanism. So if it isn’t disturbing anything, I leave her be.
If it is disruptive, I try to redirect her. She’s older now, so I will sometimes ask her if there is something else we can try to get her the same benefit. It’s usually because she is vocal stimming or humming during class time, and while she is the only child, it keeps her from paying attention. If it is something dangerous, do what you have to do to stop the behavior. If you notice their behavior heading that way, redirect it before it gets dangerous.
There is a girl on YouTube, and her channel is called Ask An Autistic. Her name is Amethyst, and she is autistic and has great input about what it is like. This is what she has to say about stemming:
Just remember, your child isn’t stimming to be bad, they are trying to cope with a sensory system that doesn’t always function the way it is supposed to. Just be there for your child, and support them in any way you can!
